I am emotionally and physically exhausted and no none cares. They say they do, and might help with a few things, but then its just back to the same thing. I guess it's true that you have to take care of you, although at times it wasn't that way. I hate sounds so .... naggy and mean. But if I try and say things nicely, it doesn't seem to make any difference, it just gets treated like I don't know any better.
I can't wait to save a little and be able to move somewhere cheaper but better than the falling down house. Maybe that will help a little once we only have our own stuff to worry about.
Sometimes, the thought sneaks in that maybe this is God punishing me for being married, divorced, married, divorced, married again and all to non-believers. But then I think that that's all in my past and when I was buried and raised with Christ, that was all forgiven. I tell you though, it's hard being married to an un-believer. I get no help.
I wish, I wish.
I don't even know what to wish for.
I'm trying to stretch $1275 a month for:
Rent 650
EMC 300
Ins. 35
Ch14 172
Gas 200
Adv. 8
not counting any extra stuff we try and do....
I'm such a disappointment. And I don't know how to fix it.
I can't wait to save a little and be able to move somewhere cheaper but better than the falling down house. Maybe that will help a little once we only have our own stuff to worry about.
Sometimes, the thought sneaks in that maybe this is God punishing me for being married, divorced, married, divorced, married again and all to non-believers. But then I think that that's all in my past and when I was buried and raised with Christ, that was all forgiven. I tell you though, it's hard being married to an un-believer. I get no help.
I wish, I wish.
I don't even know what to wish for.
I'm trying to stretch $1275 a month for:
Rent 650
EMC 300
Ins. 35
Ch14 172
Gas 200
Adv. 8
not counting any extra stuff we try and do....
I'm such a disappointment. And I don't know how to fix it.
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